![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
[Asch doesn't think it's stupid at all. Contrary, yes, and he's well aware of that. He'd said as much to his replica, back then- this isn't about logic. This is thought, emotion, feeling. He knows what he thinks, what he believes, is very very different from how he feels.
He's not sure if Van can ever understand this, but here - and now - he'll try to make it more clear.]
I don't have to hate you to disagree with what you're doing. Hate has nothing to do with it. You're my enemy because of circumstance. Because of-
[Jealousy. Fear. Disgust for the lengths you'd go to destroy the Score.
It's too much.]
... I wanted to be by your side, but you took that choice from me as soon as you chose death and replicas over living free from the Score. I'm with the replica because he understands that, not because it's what I prefer.
[Even in Luceti, even in a place with no Score at all, familiarity is safer than trying to face the past. Luke may be a replica, but for him, the innocent are never an acceptable sacrifice. And he still has people he wants to protect.]
He's not sure if Van can ever understand this, but here - and now - he'll try to make it more clear.]
I don't have to hate you to disagree with what you're doing. Hate has nothing to do with it. You're my enemy because of circumstance. Because of-
[Jealousy. Fear. Disgust for the lengths you'd go to destroy the Score.
It's too much.]
... I wanted to be by your side, but you took that choice from me as soon as you chose death and replicas over living free from the Score. I'm with the replica because he understands that, not because it's what I prefer.
[Even in Luceti, even in a place with no Score at all, familiarity is safer than trying to face the past. Luke may be a replica, but for him, the innocent are never an acceptable sacrifice. And he still has people he wants to protect.]
[Oh Van, so paranoid. Still, he smiles a bit in response, mentally making note of the location. At least Van was living closer to the ground rather then climbing stairs.]
....If you want, I can bring you something to eat, later. I still owe you a favor for the draft, after all.
....If you want, I can bring you something to eat, later. I still owe you a favor for the draft, after all.
[That makes Van laugh; softly, lowly, bitterly.]
I can't be separated from my goals and beliefs so easily. [What a miserable life it must be, to be so full of doubt and contradictions. He believes in his actions, he knows they're right, he feels it with every fiber of his being.
And yet...
Van is almost too proud to say it, even brought low as he has been by current circumstance. His pride is all he has left.
But it isn't admitting he was wrong. Not really. Finding another potential solution didn't make his original one any less valid. This one involved avenues that weren't previously known to anyone. No one could have arrived at it.]
What if I told you... [A deep breath.] ... that I may have found another way?
I can't be separated from my goals and beliefs so easily. [What a miserable life it must be, to be so full of doubt and contradictions. He believes in his actions, he knows they're right, he feels it with every fiber of his being.
And yet...
Van is almost too proud to say it, even brought low as he has been by current circumstance. His pride is all he has left.
But it isn't admitting he was wrong. Not really. Finding another potential solution didn't make his original one any less valid. This one involved avenues that weren't previously known to anyone. No one could have arrived at it.]
What if I told you... [A deep breath.] ... that I may have found another way?
[That statement about favors makes a frown flit briefly across his face, there and gone so quickly it's hardly noticeable. Favors. Of course. Well, why else would anyone do something for someone else, if not out of a sense of obligation? That's how the world works.]
That's not necessary. Not that you'll listen to me, will you?
That's not necessary. Not that you'll listen to me, will you?
[Well, he used the favor line to be polite, actually: He didn't want Van to take it as forcing help on him, or fussing or otherwise. As friendly as Frey was, he had years of lessons on stepping gently around people's pride- to even imply Van could not take care of himself in any manner could be a terrible insult with some people. It was easier to paint it as a mutual return of favor when it came to an older individual rather then otherwise.
Really, though, he just wanted to make sure the Van was truly ok.] I know it's not. I want to, though.
Really, though, he just wanted to make sure the Van was truly ok.] I know it's not. I want to, though.
If you wish to visit, you're welcome to do so.
[He doesn't need to bring food. Van is perfectly capable of feeding himself. It's not like he can stop him, though.
...And maybe it would be nice. A little.]
[He doesn't need to bring food. Van is perfectly capable of feeding himself. It's not like he can stop him, though.
...And maybe it would be nice. A little.]
I'll do that, then. Is later today ok?
[Come on, he's pretty good at cooking now. Almost two years of ongoing, determined practice helps, too. Kind of required work if you're used to a variety of food but can't cook.]
[Come on, he's pretty good at cooking now. Almost two years of ongoing, determined practice helps, too. Kind of required work if you're used to a variety of food but can't cook.]
I don't plan on going out today. That should be fine.
[Yes, this is a subtle reassurance that he has been at home, resting. ...If catching him asleep was somehow not enough for that.]
[Yes, this is a subtle reassurance that he has been at home, resting. ...If catching him asleep was somehow not enough for that.]
Great. I shall see you then. [His tone is cheerful as he heads to the kichten.... to get started on cooking a meal.]
[That makes Asch look up again, genuinely surprised, though there's no trace of hope in his gaze- he doesn't dare to feel such things anymore. Another way? Van had been insistent for so long - ever since they'd all found out the truth behind his plan - that it was the only way. That destroying the planet's very memory, and the memories contained within every living human being in Auldrant, was how the Score could be destroyed. That it was the right path, the true path. That any other option was just false hope and pointless delaying of the inevitable doom of the world.
The idea of another alternative... he'd never imagined the thought would enter Van's mind.]
...What?
[This, he's got to hear. But for much, much deeper reasoning than simple disbelief.]
The idea of another alternative... he'd never imagined the thought would enter Van's mind.]
...What?
[This, he's got to hear. But for much, much deeper reasoning than simple disbelief.]
[It was Tear that made him consider it at all. The Score must be overturned, but... he wants his sister to live happily, and he doesn't want to kill her. She's the only thing left in the world worth protecting. His way is better, more certain; but they have time here, nothing but time, no approaching deadline like on Auldrant. Perhaps with enough of it, he can be sure...]
Humanity must be removed from Auldrant, and Lorelei destroyed, or the Score's hold will remain absolute.
Removed.
Humanity must be removed from Auldrant, and Lorelei destroyed, or the Score's hold will remain absolute.
Removed.
[Removed... Asch glances down at his hands, lips pursing. It's true that leaving Auldrant had already saved his life- and the replica's, and Ion's, hell, even Van's. He could probably list off a dozen people who'd been spared by death just by being brought to this place. The same could be said of every single person meant to die in the hidden Score of death Ion had read in Zaleho.
He's... not sure how to feel about this suggestion. But it's startling how little he's against it.
One step at a time, then.]
Your plan's already in motion on Auldrant. Would you really reconsider?
He's... not sure how to feel about this suggestion. But it's startling how little he's against it.
One step at a time, then.]
Your plan's already in motion on Auldrant. Would you really reconsider?
Mm. [And one vague noise of agreement later, Van starts working (at a leisurely and restful pace). He's got things to get done, if he's going to entertain his very first Luceti guest ever today. An apartment to make presentable (and homey and lived in).]
I don't need to reconsider anything. The originals could never return, or everything would be undone. If they return, they die. It's one small modification, a possibility we weren't aware of at the time. Everything else can proceed according to plan.
[Everything...
Right to the very end.
He always wanted to make a free world. He never intended to live in it.
He'd rather go home.]
[Everything...
Right to the very end.
He always wanted to make a free world. He never intended to live in it.
He'd rather go home.]
...You'd need the right world to bring them to- one capable of supporting all the citizens of Auldrant. A free world.
[Asch shoots Van a meaningful look. Luceti has barely changed at all in the three - almost four - years that Asch has lived here. It would take a great deal of change and a lot of patience to make this world the least bit useful, nevermind actually sorting out how to transport people from one planet to another. And if Luceti turned out to be a bad choice, there's the task of finding another...
He's not about to argue against the idea, but he's still not comfortably with the thought of agreeing with Van, either. Best to play it safe by offering up complications that Van has probably already considered.]
[Asch shoots Van a meaningful look. Luceti has barely changed at all in the three - almost four - years that Asch has lived here. It would take a great deal of change and a lot of patience to make this world the least bit useful, nevermind actually sorting out how to transport people from one planet to another. And if Luceti turned out to be a bad choice, there's the task of finding another...
He's not about to argue against the idea, but he's still not comfortably with the thought of agreeing with Van, either. Best to play it safe by offering up complications that Van has probably already considered.]
It would require much effort, patience... cooperation. The Malnosso would need to be dealt with. There are technological problems to solve. We would have much work to do.
[We. He'll still take Asch back, even after all that's transpired between them, if Asch will just agree with him. They had a common goal, a noble one, if a bloody one. They can have a common goal again.]
These things would take time. Many years, perhaps. More than all the years I spent working towards this on Auldrant. Progress would be slow; but what benefits do we have here, if not that of time?
[We. He'll still take Asch back, even after all that's transpired between them, if Asch will just agree with him. They had a common goal, a noble one, if a bloody one. They can have a common goal again.]
These things would take time. Many years, perhaps. More than all the years I spent working towards this on Auldrant. Progress would be slow; but what benefits do we have here, if not that of time?
...Hm.
[He doesn't miss Van's choice of phrasing, though his brows lift a little before he narrows his eyes again. We. We, indeed. After three years - very nearly four, according to this world's time - he's discovered that there's no shortage of free time. Freedom on the other hand, is ever in short supply, unless one is content to live within the barrier.
He's not committed. He's not. Not yet, maybe not ever. But... if it could change things, if it could keep them all alive...
...if Van was able to find a way to bring the people of Auldrant here, if they could all live on this world, free and without being forced to endure these experiments all the time... maybe...]
...We could be sent back to Auldrant before we make any progress at all in freeing this world. But if we stay...
[Maybe... maybe he won't have to die.]
[He doesn't miss Van's choice of phrasing, though his brows lift a little before he narrows his eyes again. We. We, indeed. After three years - very nearly four, according to this world's time - he's discovered that there's no shortage of free time. Freedom on the other hand, is ever in short supply, unless one is content to live within the barrier.
He's not committed. He's not. Not yet, maybe not ever. But... if it could change things, if it could keep them all alive...
...if Van was able to find a way to bring the people of Auldrant here, if they could all live on this world, free and without being forced to endure these experiments all the time... maybe...]
...We could be sent back to Auldrant before we make any progress at all in freeing this world. But if we stay...
[Maybe... maybe he won't have to die.]
[It might be a while- Freyjadour decides to play it safe and make some beef stew rather then something quicker but less likely to please. He doesn't know the other man's tastes, but he has yet to meet a person who doesn't like stew.
Eventually, though, there will be a knock at Van's door when Freyjadour arrives with a bag carried in his arms- a covered pot and some fresh bakery bakery he had picked up that morning tucked inside.]
Eventually, though, there will be a knock at Van's door when Freyjadour arrives with a bag carried in his arms- a covered pot and some fresh bakery bakery he had picked up that morning tucked inside.]
Edited 2012-01-26 12:18 (UTC)
[Oh, does it ever serve any purpose when they speak? Van has his doubts, personally. It hasn't gone the way he intended since she was, what, six? It's so frustrating... and he's so much easier to rile up than his sister is. He clenches his teeth and glances away.]
Do we ever have discussions that bear repeating?
Do we ever have discussions that bear repeating?
As long as someone involved in the plan remains, it shouldn't be an issue. One person may be returned at any time. Several at once is less likely.
[He pauses for a moment, and then rolls his shoulder with a loud crack. The twitch of a wing under his shirt isn't all that out of the ordinary, but there's another movement to catch Asch's eye: the sharp edge of a shoulderblade, outlined and then hidden again under thick fabric. It's a potent hint at why Van's bringing this up now, and not when he's completely sure of it... and at why the reminder of his childhood hasn't made him discard it completely, for the opinion that the originals deserved to die.
He's simply not in any shape to fight. The Malnosso have achieved what miasma poisoning couldn't, what killing him couldn't.
He needs whatever good will he can get.]
[He pauses for a moment, and then rolls his shoulder with a loud crack. The twitch of a wing under his shirt isn't all that out of the ordinary, but there's another movement to catch Asch's eye: the sharp edge of a shoulderblade, outlined and then hidden again under thick fabric. It's a potent hint at why Van's bringing this up now, and not when he's completely sure of it... and at why the reminder of his childhood hasn't made him discard it completely, for the opinion that the originals deserved to die.
He's simply not in any shape to fight. The Malnosso have achieved what miasma poisoning couldn't, what killing him couldn't.
He needs whatever good will he can get.]
[When Van answers it, he's clearly still not 100%: his cheekbones just a bit more prominent than they were before his kidnapping, his skin a bit more pale (although to be fair, that may just be winter), and his clothes a bit looser. At least those dark circles under his eyes are mostly gone, though; because as Frey well knows, he has been sleeping.
He steps back to let Frey into a room that is... surprisingly cozy and homely actually, though still decidedly masculine. Warm tan walls, the far one almost completely covered by (mostly empty) shelves, a light wood floor with an enormous dark thick rug over it, and worn wood and leather furniture, with extra pillows and a comfortable throw draped over the back. There are, in fact, very few spots in the room that look like they wouldn't be a good place for a nap.]
I told you there was no need to bring anything. [But he sounds like he knew very well that Frey would do it anyway.]
He steps back to let Frey into a room that is... surprisingly cozy and homely actually, though still decidedly masculine. Warm tan walls, the far one almost completely covered by (mostly empty) shelves, a light wood floor with an enormous dark thick rug over it, and worn wood and leather furniture, with extra pillows and a comfortable throw draped over the back. There are, in fact, very few spots in the room that look like they wouldn't be a good place for a nap.]
I told you there was no need to bring anything. [But he sounds like he knew very well that Frey would do it anyway.]
[Asch's gaze drifts to Van's shoulder, taking once again a note of his condition. It's a small but necessary reminder of just how fragile they all are, even in this place. Death isn't permanent, but that doesn't mean worse can't be done to them. He's all too aware of that already.
It's... tempting. It's so tempting to just nod and go along with Van's idea. Isn't it what he's wanted for a long time now? A way to destroy the Score, to free the people of Auldrant, without the need for replicas or killing everyone? It's like a dream.
But he knows that it's too late. Far, far too late for him. He can't ever go back.]
You should know that you can't rely on my support in Auldrant. If you go back and remember this, you'll be on your own. I'm never going back there as long as I have a choice.
It's... tempting. It's so tempting to just nod and go along with Van's idea. Isn't it what he's wanted for a long time now? A way to destroy the Score, to free the people of Auldrant, without the need for replicas or killing everyone? It's like a dream.
But he knows that it's too late. Far, far too late for him. He can't ever go back.]
You should know that you can't rely on my support in Auldrant. If you go back and remember this, you'll be on your own. I'm never going back there as long as I have a choice.
[There is concern in his gaze as he looks the other over, taking note of the lost weight and paleness. What had the Malnosso done to him? Starved him? The cruelty of that brought to mind the state of Lordlake before water had been returned.
Upon stepping in, he is impressed by the decorating taste- it seemed like a space designed for relaxation, which is something he imagines Van needs with how he looks right now.] I know. I still wanted to, though.
[he wanted to ask if Van had been eating right since his return, but he was afraid that could be equated to 'you look like hell- eat something'.]
Upon stepping in, he is impressed by the decorating taste- it seemed like a space designed for relaxation, which is something he imagines Van needs with how he looks right now.] I know. I still wanted to, though.
[he wanted to ask if Van had been eating right since his return, but he was afraid that could be equated to 'you look like hell- eat something'.]
And here?
[That's the only question that matters.
He sits up straight (as straight as he can) and breathes shallowly, waiting for an answer. The silence is as dense as a fog around them.]
[That's the only question that matters.
He sits up straight (as straight as he can) and breathes shallowly, waiting for an answer. The silence is as dense as a fog around them.]
[...Here... that is the question, isn't it. And, with the man right in front of him, with the condition he's in, Asch realizes that he doesn't have an answer to give him right away. This wouldn't be so alarming if it didn't mean so much.
He doesn't have an answer.
Not one way or the other.
Which is... alarming, to say the least. Asch doesn't respond for a while, hands resting on his knees, gripping the material a little too tightly. He should hate this man. He should want to kill him, should take him down and indulge in a little revenge for all the wrongs he'd done, not just to the world, but to Asch himself. He should challenge Van every step of the way, regardless of his plans, regardless of what changes he's considered now that he's in Luceti. So much he should be doing.
Instead, he lowers his hands, braces himself against the stairs, and pushes himself to his feet, retrieving the near-forgotten soup pot and starting quietly down the steps. When he's gone down far enough so that Van can no longer see his expression, he finally responds.]
You've got plenty of time here to try and convince me.
[...It's not a no.]
He doesn't have an answer.
Not one way or the other.
Which is... alarming, to say the least. Asch doesn't respond for a while, hands resting on his knees, gripping the material a little too tightly. He should hate this man. He should want to kill him, should take him down and indulge in a little revenge for all the wrongs he'd done, not just to the world, but to Asch himself. He should challenge Van every step of the way, regardless of his plans, regardless of what changes he's considered now that he's in Luceti. So much he should be doing.
Instead, he lowers his hands, braces himself against the stairs, and pushes himself to his feet, retrieving the near-forgotten soup pot and starting quietly down the steps. When he's gone down far enough so that Van can no longer see his expression, he finally responds.]
You've got plenty of time here to try and convince me.
[...It's not a no.]
Page 3 of 4